Whatever You Call That List of Things You Want to Do, It's Time to Get Started

Hi. Welcome to Bloom Anywhere. I'm Gwen Moran, a writer, editor, author, and problem-solver. My goal is to share information, ideas, and resources to help you overcome obstacles, reach your goals, and get more joy out of life, even when things are messy. Thanks for joining me. (If you got this from a friend, subscribe here: Bloom Anywhere.) I'd love your feedback and suggestions for future topics. Please send me an email: connect@bloomanywhere.com.

A few days ago, I was looking for a gift. I couldn’t find anything I liked at the shop I visited. As I was driving home, I saw a sign for a place where I used to find fun items. The shop had moved, and I didn’t realize it was in a new location.

I stopped in and, within minutes, found what I wanted. As I checked out, I told the woman behind the counter that I had lost track of them since they moved, but I was glad to have found them again. She smiled and mentioned that they had been there for seven years.

“Seven years?!” I said, incredulous that it had been so long. I told her that I felt the pandemic had warped my sense of time. She agreed.

“I don’t even know where I’m going to be seven years from now,” she said. We both paused thoughtfully. Then, she looked up with a laugh and said, “I guess I’d better get started on that bucket list.”

The exchange reminded me of another moment. When I was going for chemo treatments at Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center’s Manhattan breast cancer treatment center, I remember saying something similar to my oncologist about getting moving on my bucket list. He stopped and looked me in the eye.

“We don’t say that here,” he said. I was confused.

“You don’t say what?” I asked.

“That term,” he said.

“Bucket list?”

“Yes,” he said. “Try a different name for it.”

I felt like he was issuing a challenge. My mind raced a bit.

“Okaaaayyy…how about…bliss list?”

He smiled. “Much better,” he said.

That Elusive List

In hindsight, I get what my onc was saying. ‘Bucket list’ is a bit of gallows humor—the things we want to do before we ‘kick the bucket.’ When you’re treating cancer patients, I can see how dark humor and turns of phrase can hit differently. Plus, I like “bliss list” better.

Whatever you call it, there are myriad reminders around us of how short life can be and how fast time can seem to go. (Just look at my gift shop experience.) What the heck are we doing, letting those experiences grow musty and dusty on a list—either physically or in the corners of our minds?

As I drove home, I felt a sense of urgency to do—well, something that would move me toward more of my goals. What if I never got any of them done? My thoughts were causing real anxiety. There are so many things I want to do, but I also face real constraints: health challenges, chronic pain, financial realities, time realities, etc. How would I get them all done?

When I got back, I sat in my office and did some breathing to center myself. And, out of the corner of my eye, I saw a deck of cards my friend had recently given me. They’re part of a tapping practice. Tapping a method that some people find helpful in regulating their emotions and helping with chronic pain. The cards have messages on the front, a companion book with positive explanations of the messages, and instructions for tapping practices on the back. Plus, they’re gorgeous. So, I decided to pull a card and see what it said.

“It’s time for action.” And the one right behind it said, “I let go of what I cannot control.”

It's Time

I’ve said before that I’m about 40% “woo-woo.” I am guided by reason and facts, but, as a person of faith, I leave a fair amount of room for things that I don’t understand. I don’t believe that the cards were some supernatural force sending me a message. But I do believe that they were a helpful grounding mechanism.

The truth is that, even in the face of challenges, I can act. I can do one thing—or a handful of things—that will move me closer to my goals or even fulfill them. At the same time, I can’t control everything, as much as I try to do so. But I can do what I can.

So, I figured out what that means—what I can do right now.

I can stick to my accountability practice to keep moving forward on my novel. I can also contact the friend who said they would help me with something that’s got me stuck.

I can be purposeful about putting some money aside over the next few months to build a travel fund for a trip I want to take next year. In the meantime, I can satisfy that craving for exploration and new experiences by finding places within driving distance that I’ve not yet explored. I mean, the incredible BAPS Swaminarayan Akshardham is about 40 minutes away, and I can get to the High Line (when it’s warmer) or the Philadelphia Art Museum within two hours. There are plenty of simple ways to bring wonder into my life and satisfy my wanderlust.

I can be more vigilant about building my physical strength so that, when it’s time for those trips, I will be more ready for them physically, too.

So much of the world is available to me through my laptop or phone. I can take a class to learn skills I want to acquire. I can resume brushing up on my French with Duolingo. I can learn myriad things just by visiting YouTube.

I can reach out to people who can help me achieve what’s on my list and actually let them help me.

There are so many small steps I—and we—can take to remove obstacles, move closer to our goals, and fulfill the needs we’re seeking to meet. In many cases, the very process of accomplishing what’s on our bliss lists is a big part of the bliss itself.

Let's Do It

How about you? What steps can you take—today, right now—to help move you toward satisfying a need or want you have held for a while? Maybe some virtual tours of a place you want to visit, as you save the money to do so? Can you find or create a support or accountability group to help move you forward? Can you make a plan to do something that gives you a fun, new experience or gets you out of your comfort zone?

There are so many ways to get moving on that list. What will you do? I’d love to hear your action plan. Email me at connect@bloomanywhere.com.

Hey, and if you love this newsletter, would you please tell others? This community is growing, and I'd love to keep the momentum going. Thank you!

Bloom Drops

Things I want to share with you.

Envisioning: My friend, Marcia Turner, wrote an excellent book on creating vision boards, which can be helpful (and fun) motivational tools. If you like that tactile approach to goal-setting and visualizing, Canva has free templates for vision boards and planners.

Giving: It’s time to give to prevent food insecurity. If you need to find a local food bank, check here.