Finding Connection at the Local Jiffy Lube

Hi. Welcome to Bloom Anywhere. I'm Gwen Moran, a writer, editor, author, and problem-solver. My goal is to share information, ideas, and resources to help you overcome obstacles, reach your goals, and find more joy in life, even when things are messy. Thanks for joining me. (If you got this from a friend, subscribe here: Bloom Anywhere.) I'd love your feedback and suggestions for future topics. Please send me an email: connect@bloomanywhere.com.

I didn’t expect to find a lion in the waiting room of my local Jiffy Lube, but when I opened the door and stepped inside, there he was. He greeted me with a big roar, and I reacted with an overdramatic “Oh, my goodness,” as I clutched my chest and pretended to fall into the empty chair closest to me. “That is the scariest roar I’ve ever heard!”

Clearly delighted at my reaction, he explained that he was not just a lion, but a Fireman Lion. He was sitting in the chair next to his mother, who smiled at the exchange, wearing a red plastic firefighter’s hat and galoshes to match. When he slid off the chair, he stood a little more than three feet tall and had a head of long, light blonde hair. He roared at me again, and I feigned another bout of panic.

Also sitting in the waiting room were two men, both staring at their phones. One was a 40-something guy in a red long-sleeve polo shirt who was clearly uninterested in the interaction unfolding before him. The other, sporting cropped salt-and-pepper hair, looked to be in his 50s or early 60s. He was wearing a Georgetown sweatshirt (anathema to this Syracuse alumna—collegiate sports rivalries run deep) and glanced up periodically as we chatted.

A Conversation for the Lion-Hearted

Fireman Lion roared again. I could have simply ignored him or pulled out my phone like the others in the room. His mother would probably have shushed and distracted him so as not to bother me. But she seemed okay with our conversation, so I asked him how old he was.

He replied that he was three years old, holding up as many fingers. Then, he told me that he had a baby sister. In between roars, he said that he liked being a big brother.

“It’s a very important job, along with being a Fireman Lion,” I said, then asked him if he liked other animals in addition to lions.

His mom reminded him of an Amazon book he had (it's unclear if the book was about the Amazon or from Amazon). That began a discussion of different types of big cats and their attributes. Georgetown Sweatshirt shifted in his chair and cleared his throat.

“Did you see that video about the woman who raised the lion and then saw it years later, and the lion was happy to see her?” he interjected hesitantly. “I like that video.”

Fireman Lion roared his approval, and the rest of us agreed that lions are cool and that it would be fun to pet a lion who was happy to see us, but probably not fun if the lion was not happy to see us. The conversation drifted to the merits of tigers (big and impressive stripes), cheetahs (fast and sometimes friendly), jaguars (mysterious), and ocelots (underappreciated).

Then, one of the staff members opened the waiting room door and said that Georgetown Sweatshirt’s oil change was done. The news ended the sweet, earnest conversation between four people, most of whom didn’t know each other’s names. Georgetown Sweatshirt stood up to leave, and we all waved "goodbye" to him. While the conversation lasted about 15 minutes, the feeling of connection and shared humanity buoyed me for the rest of the day.

The world would be so much better if we were open to having more silly, playful, unexpected, heartfelt conversations with strangers of all ages. How much more satisfying would our casual exchanges be if it weren’t frowned upon or “weird” to start with a roar and a passionate discourse about the wonders of our miraculous planet instead of tepid comments about the weather?

I felt a little bad for Red Polo Shirt. He sure missed out.

Combatting Loneliness

As I reviewed a year of Bloom Anywhere for last week’s reflection, I realized that posts on combating loneliness were among those that generated the most responses. The loneliness epidemic also surfaces in the work I do about volunteerism and in other editorial work. In this second year, I’ll be writing more about loneliness and how to alleviate and eliminate it. As always, if there are specific topics you’d like me to cover or research, I’m happy to do so. Send an email with your thoughts to connect@bloomanwhere.com.

Bloom Drops

I interviewed former Surgeon General Vivek Murthy several years ago. He had written a book about loneliness and social isolation and the damage they can do to humans. A report issued during his tenure found that chronic loneliness does as much health damage as smoking 15 cigarettes per day. So, I loved this list of resources to combat social isolation, published by the Foundation for Social Connection Action Network.

It can be hard to reach out and try to find connection, especially if you’re introverted. But if you’re lonely, hurting, and need help, this list is a good place to start.