Why You Need the Real-Life Equivalent of "Just Keep Scrolling"

Hi. Welcome to Bloom Anywhere. I'm Gwen Moran, a writer, editor, author, and problem-solver. My goal is to share information, ideas, and resources to help you overcome obstacles, reach your goals, and find more joy in life, even when things are messy. Thanks for joining me. (If you got this from a friend, subscribe here: Bloom Anywhere.) I'd love your feedback and suggestions for future topics. Please send me an email: connect@bloomanywhere.com.

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Ah, December. So many gatherings, so little time.

During the next week or so, many of us will find ourselves in a room or around a table with loved ones. And, within these groups of people, there may be a few folks who may hold views that aren’t congruent with our own—and who are not at all hesitant about sharing them inappropriately. Such behavior can turn a pleasant holiday gathering into a conflict worthy of a UFC-sanctioned steel cage and an audience of screaming fans.

Taking a Break from Saving the World

To be clear, I am typically not afraid to address an injustice, bias, or slight. I don’t laugh at racist or misogynistic jokes to be polite. When I am with someone who holds a view I find abhorrent, I make my case against it. In fact, I once relished dinners with friends who had differing views. We’d engage in long, respectful conversations and debates about how to best solve the world’s problems. I have often said that, regardless of our world views, we usually agreed far more than not.

At some point, those discussions became increasingly bitter and angry, so we stopped. I have my opinions on when and why. I’m sure they do, too.

The point is that there are times when it’s okay to “scroll on by” or otherwise disengage from some conversations. After a few glasses of wine and a healthy dose of tryptophan and processed carbohydrates, when Grandpa Rob or Aunt Suzanne begins sharing their thoughts on the state of the world today, you can fire back. Or you can refuse to take the bait. You don’t owe a response to every remark. Respond by:

• Replying with a neutral, “That’s one way to see it.”
• Changing the subject, which can defuse the moment without escalating it.
• Telling them that you’re there to spend time with loved ones, not to debate this subject.
• Removing yourself to refill your drink, help in the kitchen, take a walk, or sit with someone else, rather than staying polite but miserable.

You're not betraying your values by choosing to pass on a conversation or argument that will likely be a losing battle and which will waste your energy and damage relationships that you value. Save that energy for something more productive and impactful later.

A Resounding "But"

Before deciding whether to engage or tag out, ask yourself whether this conversation will matter in a week, a month, or a year. Most of the time, it won’t. But there are times when it does. If comments are abusive or hurtful toward a loved one, or if the situation is escalating, intervention or removal of the at-risk person may be required.

Holidays are temporary; relationships are ongoing. Sometimes, it’s okay to protect your peace, especially when the stakes are low. Chances are that you’re not going to change Grandpa Rob’s view over a big plate of turkey when emotions are running high. But if you want to try, you can always schedule a conversation later, allowing you to speak your piece and keep the peace—at least for one gathering.

I hope you’re all having a happy holiday season. Wishing you all good things in 2026. Thank you for subscribing to and reading Bloom Anywhere. Your time is a privilege I don’t take for granted. As always, I welcome your thoughts and correspondence at connect@bloomanywhere.com.

Bloom Drops

Things I want to share with you.

Getting rid of debt. As we covered a couple of weeks ago, the pressure to overspend during the holidays is enormous. If you’re struggling with debt, you can find free, reputable help through organizations like the National Foundation for Credit Counseling (NFCC), which connects you with certified credit counselors who can help you build a realistic payoff plan. (Be sure you choose a nonprofit credit counseling organization.) Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (CFPB) tools offer accessible guidance on budgeting, debt collection rights, and choosing a trustworthy counselor. For hands-on structure, nonprofit agencies such as Money Management International provide debt management plans and financial education. Your local library or community center may also host personal finance workshops. Be careful of some of the famous or social media-based “experts.” Some of their advice is dated and may not be right for you, or is flat-out wrong. Choose the information and approach that works for you.